September, 2011 – Life is Not for Sissies!

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Lighten Up with Lisa

 

Life is NOT for Sissies!

 

By Lisa Dawn Wax

 

This is a piece of advice given to me by my 90-year-old great aunt.

Lisa Dawn Wax
Lisa Dawn Wax

 At the time I couldn’t stop laughing – partly because I was wondering how far down the road of her 90-year-journey did it take her to figure this out and partly because it is – oh so true. Over the last two years of writing “Lighten Up with Lisa,” I’ve written articles about the importance of Tolerance, Patience, Acceptance, Growth, Compassion, Faith, Hope, Belief, Love, Balance, Happiness, Endurance, Strength, Bravery and Courage. Yes, I’ve hit upon many, many fundamentals of how to live life to the fullest and NOT as a Sissy. However, the truth of the matter is this; sometimes we all have a “fall from grace.”

 

The idiom “fall from grace” is defined as a loss of status, prestige or respect; LOSS being the key word. I can’t think of anyone I know who hasn’t experienced LOSS in one form or another. Whether it was a loss of status, prestige, respect, or perhaps a more personal loss of someone or something held extremely dear, the result can feel the same; an overwhelming sense of sadness and despair that makes us feel as if we’ve fallen from the grace of God. Grief is defined as “the response or reaction to loss.” Grief experts agree that in order to move past or through one’s grief, one must first process the loss. There are different stages of grief and we all experience them differently, at different times, in different order, and different intensities. There is no cookie-cutter recipe for grief relief. So, what do you do when you’ve read all the self-help books, listened to all the spiritual gurus and motivational life coaches, prayed and meditated, sucked it up and/or sucked some down and everything that you’ve learned and come to know or believe just doesn’t seem to add up anymore? What do you do when you don’t know up from down, right from wrong, whether to move forward or go back? What do you do when you have fallen from grace and hit your bottom? A while back I wrote about Thomas Moore’s book, Care of the Soul. Moore wrote about how it is in our darkest moments that we find our strengths and we should therefore embrace the dark as well as the light. I wholeheartedly agree.

 

I recently experienced my own personal fall and period of darkness and have come to the following conclusion. After the fall but at no particular point and regardless of the root cause of one’s sadness, there is a choice to be made – to either take the low road or take the high road. I’m here to promote the high road. For me taking the high road means falling back in line with grace and dignity, pride and purpose. It means no longer being angry, no longer blaming this, that and the other, being over and done with the “pity party,” being able to take that first scary, albeit tiny, baby step towards the freedom of the light. In essence it is getting reacquainted with all the qualities and virtues listed in the first paragraph.  You will know when it is time. You will know when you are ready and not a moment sooner. Remember the words of Anais Nin, “And the time came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”  Whenever this time comes is the time to take action. It is time to stand up, look Life straight in the eye, and proclaim with a broad smile, “Is that all you’ve got?” There is no need to be ashamed of where you’ve been. There is no need to regret being human and spending a brief time within the inner recesses of the darkness of your soul. Remember, life is NOT for sissies so be proud and have the guts to choose the high road. For as Teddy Roosevelt once said, “The credit belongs to the man (woman) who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by sweat and blood…because there is no effort without error and shortcoming…”  The high road leads you to a new life of composure, serenity, coolness and calm.

 

On the other hand there is the low road, and let’s face it, this alternative isn’t pretty. The low road breeds drama queens and king babies. Everywhere I turn people are saying, “I don’t want to be involved with drama, especially other people’s drama.”  Well, I’m sorry to say, “NEWSFLASH. Life is filled with drama.” However, once again, we are faced with a choice of how to react. We can choose to complain until we’ve alienated everyone who would listen. We can choose to blame everyone else without ever looking at our own behaviors, attitudes and actions. We can choose to follow a path of self-destruction that leads us nowhere we’d ever want to go. We can choose to stay in the darkness indefinitely and resent everyone around us who seems surrounded by light. We can choose to get so wrapped up in the drama that we can no longer recognize life without it. But really, what part of that makes any sense?? Who amongst us wouldn’t rather take the high road and realign with the grace of God?

 

For millennia life has been hard. Did the cavemen have it so easy? Did the Crusaders, Pilgrims or American Pioneers? No. Life will ultimately continue to be challenging. People will undoubtedly continue to experience loss and to grieve. I pray that whatever challenge may hit you next that these words I’ve written today may bring you some comfort and help guide you in the choice of your actions.  While we may not always have control over what happens to us, we do have control over how we choose to respond. May we all live 90+ years responding gracefully with the inner strength it takes us to do so.

 

Until next time, may your days be brighter and your lives be lighter.

 

Lightworker Lisa

 

Let me ignite the light in your life!

If you would like to submit a topic for publication, you can email me directly at [email protected]. 

 

A Lightworker is someone with an innate ability to know and heal.  Lightworkers believe it is their divine mission or higher purpose to write, teach or counsel others that spiritual methods can heal any situation.  Lightworkers are souls who volunteered, before birth, to help people learn about love and heal from the effects of fear. Lisa Dawn Wax, aka Lightworker Lisa, is a born Lightworker with intuitive abilities to help, heal and to identify sources of pain, clarify current life situations, and successfully redirect one’s focus into positive channels.  If you are in need of affordable healing and life coaching with immediate results, call her at 561-594-3948 or visit her website www.lightworkerlisa.com.