KIM

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The Great Divide

Finding Common Ground in Divisive Times

This is one interview in a 6-part series.  The interviews were anonymous, and names changed to keep anonymity. 

  1. Why do you think our country is so divided right now?

Kim: Well, I think that it’s fueled by the politics in power, money and the “haves” and “have nots.”  I also think that some of the media that’s so slanted is not helping.  I also think that social media plays a role.  People say things on social media that are untrue, and these things go unchallenged.  People air their discontent on social media, it’s negative and it’s created a lot of division.  People say things online that they wouldn’t say to someone’s face.  I think there are people who don’t have enough to do constructively; negative breeds negative.  And I think there’s a lot of people who are hurting, economically and otherwise.  They are ripe to fall into these conspiracy theories and it almost has a cult-like flavor.  I see it on both sides. 

  • 2. Tell us a little about yourself. 

Kim: Originally from the Northeast.  I’m in the counseling profession. 

  • 3. Would you describe yourself as liberal, conservative or independent?  Why?  Have you always seen yourself this way or have you changed over time?

Kim: I think I would put myself as an Independent.  Yes, I have always been an Independent.  And that’s another thing that’s ridiculous – why can’t we see these candidates debate who are Independent?  Until there’s a strong third party, things will be polarized.  Why can’t Independents vote in the primaries? 

  • 4. What are the issues that you feel most strongly about? 

Kim: With the line of work that I do, I see a lot of women who are living in abusive relationships, but because of the economy they are kind of stuck.  We know that 1 in 8 girls will experience rape before the age of 18.  And a 6-week rule on abortion is way too early.  What’s going to happen to these children who are born from rape situations?  I feel that women’s rights are a priority for me because of the work that I do.

That ties into another thing for me…it’s health care.  The system is sadly broken, which also affects women’s rights.  I’m self-employed, so I have to buy my own policies.  These health insurance companies have way too much power.  I see people in my office who can’t afford MRIs or have to go to a replacement prescription because they can’t afford their prescribed pharmaceuticals.

And mental health is sorely ignored in this country.  That’s another huge issue.

  • 5. What subjects would you say might be a place for common ground?  In other words, places where your views might intersect with someone who you would otherwise be voting very differently from you?

Kim: I would hope that health care would be one of them.  I know a lot of people who are really conservative, but also don’t agree with the 6-week ban on abortion. 

They recently spent $60K on new “Welcome Signs” for Florida, welcoming people to the “free state of Florida”, but they wouldn’t pass free menstruation products to girls in school.  Girls are missing school because they can’t afford these products.

I think we need to keep Church and State separate.  Where is it going to stop?  I think we have to protect religious freedoms. 

I would think we can all agree that we need to make our communities safer and screen people better for gun usage.  There are certain weapons that shouldn’t be on the street.  I grew up in a hunting background and I agree with being able to kill and eat deer.  I don’t have a problem with that, but there are certain people who should not have guns.  The 2nd Amendment was created when we had muskets, and I don’t think people need full arsenals.

There are common ground areas where there are things we are not doing. Until we get back to the center, I think we are really in trouble.  There are radical people on both sides. 

  • 6. How do you feel about the January 6th insurrection?

Kim: I think it was a crime.  I think the people spoke when we voted.  And to have a coup event in this country is a sad commentary of where we are as a nation.  To hear those people chanting, “Hang Mike Pence” was devastating. 

People have to take some personal responsibility here.

  • 7. Do you have friends who think differently politically from you?  If so, do you have conversations about what’s going on politically?  Or do you avoid them?

Kim: I have a lot of friends who think very differently from me.  We have such good friendships and so many other things that we share with each other; there’s a mutual respect.  But there are certain things I won’t discuss with certain people.

  • 8. What do you think the solution is for bringing people together again?

Kim: We need a strong leadership from the top, with mediation skills that can bridge the divide.  I think it starts there.  People need to be more sensitive to how they use social media and what they post.  Start to be more empathetic.  I think we’ve lost empathy on so many levels.  I think we need to be teaching empathy and tolerance in our schools.  There are curriculums that teach tolerance and empathy, and those principles are grounded in all curriculums.  We need to be teaching kids to give back early on.  Things like Interact for Rotary Club should be mandatory, early on.

I went to Catholic School until 8th grade.  In (I think) 5th grade, the teacher divided up the class by eye color.  Certain kids had to sit in the back of the class and go to lunch late.  They were treated differently.  It was an important experience about empathy that I’ll always remember.

  • 9. When we don’t agree on things, what’s the key to maintaining civility?

Kim: I think breaking things down into smaller steps to find common ground that we can agree on is the way to do it.  I remember years ago when I was working in schools, we taught kids conflict resolution.  I think we need to teach kids healthy ways to express their emotions.  Not violence.  Getting back to listening and validating other people’s points; basic communication skills are key. 

Anything else?

The whole way we carry out the election in this country is really a shame.  The money that is spent and raised makes it more of an auction instead of an election.  We could save so much money by just having one channel where you give candidates equal airtime.  Look at yard signs, for example.  They don’t persuade people to vote, just because they see someone has a yard sign.  And then they don’t pick them up after the election.  They become litter.  Unfortunately, it’s all about money.